Midget sex pt 2 tonight
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
