Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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