it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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