Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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