I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I'm passing your future prison.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
