Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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