so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
You are a genius and a whore.
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