Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
