i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
This beer is not sobering me up at all
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
