your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
