is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
