no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
seriously iPhone. stop autocorrecting all my fucks into ducks. you're making all my strong worded texts look harmless and adorable.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
