Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
i think i just lost a toe