I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
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He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.