can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
