Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(215): View more from Pennsylvania

omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(215): omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina http://tfl.nu/buf1

Replies (56) Good night (6380) Bad night (2145) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(812): View more from Indiana

i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(812): i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys. http://tfl.nu/wntn

Replies (73) Good night (7368) Bad night (688) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(920): View more from Wisconsin

The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(920): The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap. http://tfl.nu/xkff

Replies (8) Good night (560) Bad night (4281) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(850): View more from Florida

my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(850): my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom? http://tfl.nu/5x0x

Replies (48) Good night (6157) Bad night (1554) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(650): View more from California

Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(650): Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot. http://tfl.nu/jbjf

Replies (8) Good night (2987) Bad night (657) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(559): View more from California

The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(559): The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway. http://tfl.nu/e3fd

Replies (7) Good night (2525) Bad night (727) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(317): View more from Indiana

She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(317): She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended http://tfl.nu/jhzt

Replies (14) Good night (942) Bad night (3091) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(410): View more from Maryland

In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(410): In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub http://tfl.nu/jeln

Replies (5) Good night (2016) Bad night (639) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(719): View more from Colorado

You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(719): You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians http://tfl.nu/35a3

Replies (3) Good night (2062) Bad night (566) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(610): I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun. http://tfl.nu/gl1b

Replies (6) Good night (1523) Bad night (1048) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(530): View more from California

It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(530): It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle. http://tfl.nu/j4o3

Replies (9) Good night (1894) Bad night (403)
Favorite
(718): View more from New York

Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(718): Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital http://tfl.nu/1aye

Replies (2) Good night (438) Bad night (1360) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(419): View more from Ohio

I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(419): I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation. http://tfl.nu/t73g

Replies (2) Good night (851) Bad night (642) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(928): View more from Arizona

The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(928): The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death. http://tfl.nu/lz31

Replies (11) Good night (348) Bad night (1650) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(954): View more from Florida

I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(954): I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security. http://tfl.nu/su6q

Replies (7) Good night (1034) Bad night (252) Order T-Shirt

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: