I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
