dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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