My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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