I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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