Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
