She's JV to your varsity
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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