STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
These 19 Ladies Love Pegging Their Men
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed