Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
It's just like the Real World with babies
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
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