So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize