Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
