I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
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