Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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