Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
