Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Randomize
