I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
COCAINE IS GR8
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
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