Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Randomize