what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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