She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Even my vagina gasped.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
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