There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
