omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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