Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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