He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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