Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Randomize