He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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