I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
