distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
