It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Randomize
