my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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