dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
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