Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
