Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
