I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
