worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
