They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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