we're chasing vodka with high fives
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
