You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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